Learning from the "Baby Mama's"

1/19/2014

DEANN AND IVY

Sitting at my desk, immersed in my work, yet hearing and feeling a conversation across the room between two single Mothers .. both whom I like and admire .. that was a "wow" moment for me yesterday. They could have been my own Mother, divorced with three children in the '50s .. they could have been my Son's Mother after we were divorced .. in fact, they could be two of the millions of women who take on the task of raising their children without a man in the picture. It dawned on me, as I listened to their very frank and telling conversation, that the circumstances leading up to them being single with children simply don't matter .. what does matter is they are doing it.

I asked Deann and Ivy if I could take their picture, because I already knew I was writing this "piece" ..  they said "yes". They said "yes" like millions of women who nurture their children during stressful times. My own little sister came to mind ...

It would take a book to describe my feelings during and after the amiable conversation between those two single Mothers who sat in the office and shared.  Neither of them will ever know how deeply this man was touched by their innocent banter.

I dedicate this post to you, Single Mothers, with respect and empathy for the task you perform.

Yesterday I spent some quality time ... learning from the "Baby Mama's".

Mahalo, Obrigado, Gracias, et Merci Ladies .. I wish you peace and happiness ...

from Kauai to Paris ... and all places between

MY WONDERFUL SISTER SALLY AND MY INCREDIBLE MOTHER HEIDI

10 Comments

Sally

1/19/2014 06:07:00 am

:) Thank you dear brother. This is a very sweet post and I appreciate it.....all except for the picture of me with my eyes closed. LOL And yes, being a single mother, or, these days, a single father, has many challenges and is not always an easy row to hoe. But life happens at times, unplanned and unrehearsed. Fortunately we are pretty resilient beings and can forge our way forward with the support of family and friends. I am glad that you had the opportunity to hear these two lovely ladies sharing their stories and I am even more glad that you were open to the fullness of what was being shared. Thank you for your kind and loving words. I love you.

Bill link

1/19/2014 06:59:51 am

Thanks Sis .. love you too! Credit where credit is due ...

cynthia

1/19/2014 01:02:46 pm

What a lovely tribute to mothers everywhere….whether raising a child by themselves or otherwise and you never truly raise a child by yourself. Loving and raising a child is a lifetime commitment like none other. Your sister, Sally, and your Mother are beautiful! Thank you for your thoughts today.

Bill link

1/19/2014 02:15:19 pm

Thank you, Cynthia .. and thanks for the compliment to my Mother and Sister .. they are beautiful !! Aloha

Debbie Ambrous link

1/20/2014 06:01:42 am

Bill, it's rather amazing that we were both benefiting from the courage of the Baby Mama's yesterday. We took quilts, an inflatable queen bed, cushions, plates, cups, glasses, a few pictures for a blank wall to a young widow with two children who just moved here with almost nothing. I'm thankful that she found a small house with a beautiful yard for the children. She is full of cheer. You would never know her circumstances unless you asked or investigated for yourself. She had tears in her eyes when we left and her little son hugged and kissed us. Don't say that we did anything special because we did not. The courageous lady deserves the credit and I hope and pray that she has happiness in her life. I hope and pray for the same for the vast number of others who are also in her shoes. P.S. I added your website as a recommended site on www.AFrenchOpportunity.com

Bill link

1/20/2014 06:21:58 am

Debbie .. Giving / the greatest Gift of all ... and you DID do something very special .. good for you! I'm honored to be listed as a recommended site on www.AFrenchOpportunity.com .. Thank you so much, I'll strive to make certain I honor that recommendation with quality writings. Merci, Debbie, Merci Beaucoup

P.S. That young lady wouldn't happen to be the widow of a service man, would she?

Debbie Ambrous link

1/20/2014 06:58:37 am

Bill, I don't know the circumstances yet. But likely I will hear as we learn more of her life. For now, it was a matter of helping with some basics. I do know that she is a warm, energetic and courageous person.

Bill link

1/20/2014 11:25:22 am

Debbie, keep me, and other readers I'm sure, posted. Who knows where we might be able to asist. Aloha!

Mom

1/20/2014 03:05:38 pm

What an exceptionally nice blog. I know it is sincere and I know those two young ladies are more than happy to have been the inspiration for your tribute. We see many single young mothers who are doing a really fine job with little and I always have a lot of empathy for them. Many of them seem to be so patient, so loving with their children and they undoubtedly are, at times, worn out and worried. Good for you, Billy, for your empathy, thoughtfulness and giving fitting words to express your thoughts.

Bill link

1/20/2014 03:30:55 pm

Thank you, Mom ... I was in Costco today, getting "vittles" for Baby and Vicious Bitch. Since writing this piece, I have become aware of women shopping with their children .. what a challenge that must be! As a lone male shopper, even I have trouble making selections .. but with one or two children expressing their wants and needs tossed into the mix, I've gotta give it to you gals .. that looks like a darned tough mission! (and single Fathers too .. don't worry Boys, I've got your back). I marvel at these "epiphany moments", these "Aha" times .. and I appreciate them more and more with every passing year. Of course, along with the discoveries, I become acutely aware of my past shortcomings and idiocy .. but life IS about today and I'm living it :-) I'm so glad you are enjoying the blog, Mom .. after all, you helped start the process those many years ago .. obviously, that's what Mothers do.

Learning from the "Baby Mama's"

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